It’s never the fault of the person at fault

I’ve had a new musing in recent days. Well, I suppose it has been brewing over time and it has just finally come to light. I realized I wanted to write about after watching a particular Dr. Phil episode.

I love watching Dr. Phil, and I hope he reads this and one day I can meet him and he can assess my personality traits. Anyway, this particular episode I saw was about these twin girls who happened to be drug addicts. Their story was that their father abandoned them at a young age and now that they are drug addicts, he didn’t want to bring them around his home as they could potentially have a bad influence on the 10-year-old child he has with his current wife.

The episode was focused around his abandonment of the two girls, and they basically said that if he hadn’t done that, they probably would have a better life and wouldn’t have gotten into drugs.

And Dr. Phil seemed to completely agree. The show centered around them telling their father this, and then Dr. Phil sending them to rehab.

Did the father do a not so nice thing by abandoning them? Yes. Would there life gone down a different path if it wasn’t for his action? Maybe. But why do the girls get no accountability for the decision they made to get into drugs?

I understand that after a person is addicted, it is extremely difficult to quit. And that it is comparable to a disease. But still, haven’t there been situations where fathers/mothers haven’t been in people’s lives, and the person didn’t do drugs? No doubt, people’s situations are different. They could have been in an environment where the lifestyle was accepted, where the drugs were readily available. My point is not that these girls should be lectured and belittled for the fact they are addicts. They absolutely need help and rehab, but I don’t think it’s fair to spend the hour calling out the father, and blaming him entirely for the situation.

Am I wrong? I want to hear your opinion on the matter. It just seems that these days the easiest thing/common thing is to blame the parents, blame the situation, blame someone else for any mistakes that are made. I sometimes think that people need to be held accountable for their actions and the decisions they make.

So, leave me a comment and share your opinion.


  1. Where was the other parent, I would worry about the current child. You need a library card, you watch too much tv.

  2. I agree completely. No one ever wants to take responsibility for their actions. I agree maybe the father sucked and had he not abandoned them, things would have been different. However, There are people who come from WAY worse circumstances (inner city kids lets say) who don’t get in to drugs or crime. Then there are wealthy affluent kids who have had every opportunity and wonderful loving parents and they DO get in to drugs. People, including kids, really need to be more accountable for their actions… great blog and post, can’t wait to read more!!! check mine out if you can, and follow me too 🙂 thanks!!/KellyRizParker

  3. I just have to say that I’m a super opinionated person and love hearing other people talk who have strong feelings towards their opinion. I feel strength behind your words, and I can tell you truly feel what you are saying. I think this is why I enjoy reading all your posts so much! I love writing, but I am terrible at it. I hope one day to be able to express my words as well as you do. 🙂


  4. Insightful Megan, very insightful and I must agree that the battle cry of “Its not my fault” is heard much too often in our society. It starts at the top with the leaders of this country and filters all the way down to the bottom elements of society who are criminals because…blah, blah, blah.

    Even today’s school systems, with the “Nobody left behind” policy, teach the children that “its not their fault if they fail, they are all still winners” …… B*LLSH*T!

    You and I are each responsible for every action and/or inaction we do or do not take and nobody else is responsible.

    Keep up the good work Megan!

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